Aegis
by purlysurly
Summary: A marriage on their own terms and a honeymoon as fulfilling as any human/vampire one can be. No Renesmee in this story and Bella's transformation is on her terms. But what happens when it goes awry? My piece for FAGE 11, written for Cjesmom.
1. Chapter 1

**FAGE 11: Are you in...?**

**Title: Aegis**

**Written for: Cejsmom**

**Written by: Purlysurly**

**Rating: T**

**Prompt: Cejsmom said: "I love a story that can bring a lost couple back together and give them a second chance." Summary: A marriage on their own terms and a honeymoon as fulfilling as any human/vampire one can be. No Renesmee in this story and Bella's transformation is on her terms. But what happens when it goes awry? **

**If you would like to see all the stories that are a part of this exchange visit the Facebook group Fanficaholics Anon: Where Obsession Never Sleeps, or add the C2 to get all the stories direct to your inbox.**

**Thanks to my fantastic beta, Edward's First Kiss. **

**This is my first time writing for FAGE (the Fic Awesome Gift Exchange!) and my first time writing vampward. So, keep that in mind, yeah? We've got 13 chapters, all posting today ('cause thems the rules!). Let me know what you think!**

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"Alice, anything?" Edward asks. Tension and worry radiate off him as he rakes his hand through his hair.

"I'm sorry, Edward," Alice replies from the doorway. "You know I haven't been able to see much of Bella's future at all lately. My original vision of her is still there, though. She's one of us. And she's happy. Hold on to that."

"She's doing fine, son," Carlisle says, trying to sooth Edward's frayed nerves. He moves to stand behind Edward's chair beside Bella's bed and puts a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Her transformation will be over soon. Then you have forever to look forward to." Carlisle squeezes Edward's shoulder, then exits the room, taking Alice with him and closing the door. Edward is left alone, gazing at the beauty that is Bella; his wife.

For the hundredth time he reviews the horrible series of events that brought them here. If he hadn't been such a fool after Bella's birthday, the Volturi would never have been involved. Bella would still be human. She'd still blush when he complimented her, and he'd be able to listen to her heartbeat. But no. Because he ran to Italy, and she – god bless her – rescued him, now they know about her. And they demand that the law be followed.

Perhaps he should be a bit more grateful. They hadn't insisted that Bella be changed right then and there. They had granted them time. Time they had used to repair their fractured relationship, coming out of it stronger than ever. Time to get married and go on a honeymoon. If Edward could blush, he would as he thought of all the amazing sex they had had while at Isle Esme.

But once they came home, reality had set in quickly. Bella wanted to be changed, and he was honor-bound to hold up his end of the bargain. She married him; he would change her.

They spent a few weeks putting everything in order. Charlie and Renee believed they would be going to the East Coast for college. Bella would keep in touch and they'd be able to share the holidays for a year or two. Then life would get busy, and they'd claim other commitments kept them from coming home over summer break. Skype and Facetime would be sufficient for another year or two. Then they would stage an accident that would tragically kill the young couple.

Bella still struggled with the pain this would cause her parents, but there was no other way. She took comfort knowing that she would be able to watch over them from a distance for the rest of their lives. It was how it had to be.

Carlisle and Bella had discussed ways that might make the transition easier for her. Though morphine or anesthetic wouldn't help the entire time, as the venom would burn through it quickly, they hoped it would help mute the initial pain. So, two evenings ago, Edward and Bella had been cuddled on the bed, sharing a few sweet kisses as Carlisle added a sedative to the IV that he'd placed in Bella's arm.

Bella's eyes never left Edward's, and he stared right back, whispering how much he loved her and how much they had to look forward to. He told of the places he wanted to show her until her eyelids closed and her head dropped to his shoulder. Then, he laid her back gently and slid off the bed. He spent a moment making sure she was in a comfortable position and arranged the blankets just so.

"I don't think I can do this, Carlisle. I can't be the one to cause her such horrific pain."

"I can do it for you if you'd like, son. But I know you can do this. And you know how much Bella wants it to be you. She wants it to be your venom."

"I know," he'd said. "I know."

Edward took a deep breath, and he felt a wave of calm wash over him, muting his worry. He sent a feeling of gratitude back to Jasper and then began.

Carlisle stood by Edward as he bit into the soft skin of Bella's neck, pulling him back before he took too much blood. Then he calmly encouraged Edward as he sank the syringe full of venom directly into Bella's heart.

They weren't exactly sure what the impact would be as neither had ever heard of anyone being changed in this manner. But they were reasonably sure it wouldn't cause any harm, and they hoped it might make the transition go faster.

Now, 52 hours later there's still no sign of Bella waking. In fact, she's been completely still. None of them have ever seen anything like it. All of them, except Alice, graphically recall the pain of their own transformations. Carlisle and Jasper, who had seen many humans changed, have never seen a person not writhing in agony as the venom burns through every living cell.

As usual, Bella is an anomaly. Perhaps it's the anesthetic after all. Maybe it's the injection directly into her heart. Whatever the reason, Edward is beyond worried about what it may mean.

He hasn't left her side and has distracted himself by continuing to talk about the plans they have made. The plan to move to Alaska while Bella acclimates to her new life, learning to control her feeding urges, discovering how to use her enhanced abilities. Edward is curious to find out if Bella will have a special gift as a vampire. Since the special abilities he's aware of usually come from some inclination in the person's human life, he can't begin to imagine what sort of gift she might have. But with all the surprises Bella has brought to their lives, he would certainly bet it will be something amazing.

As Edward sits reflecting on these things, another part of his brain is monitoring Bella's heartbeat and watching for any movement. He realizes that her heartbeat, once steady and strong, begins to race. The heart is the last organ to succumb to the venom, and he knows this is its last valiant attempt to fight it off.

All his attention is on the sound. Her precious heart tripping along at an unbelievable rate. It's so fast, so loud, he wonders if the organ will survive the transformation or if it will give out before the venom has completed its work.

Then, without further fanfare or spectacle, Bella's heart stops.

The room is completely, deathly silent.

Edward rises from his chair and stands next to her bed. He grasps her left hand in his and gazes intently at her face. The rest of the family come to the room, having heard the last beat of Bella's humanity. First Alice and Jasper file in, standing along the far wall followed by Carlisle and Esme, then Emmett and Rosalie.

They are still as statues, none of them even breathing, as they wait.

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**Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to S. Meyer. No infringement intended.**


	2. Chapter 2

Bella's eyes open and her gaze shifts minutely. She turns her head slightly to the right as she raises her hand and examines it. The sunlight streaming through the window bounces rainbows off her skin.

Then she inhales deeply through her nose and, in the blink of an eye, leaps off the bed, ripping her hand from Edward's grasp and lands in a defensive crouch in the corner of the room, as far removed from everyone as possible.

"She's threatened by having so many of us so close," Carlisle says soothingly. "We should leave for now. Though, Jasper, perhaps you should stay with Edward." He throws a comforting smile to Bella before leading everyone else out of the room.

Bella watches them go, tense in her crouch and her gaze suspicious.

"Bella?" Edward says cautiously. "It's me, Edward. You're okay."

Bella's eyes whip to his face but she says nothing.

"She's feeling suspicious, threatened, and confused," Jasper says quietly.

"I don't need an empath to tell me that, Jasper," Edward hisses. "Bella – love – everything's going to be okay," he says to her, his voice soft and full of love. "I don't know how much you remember, but we had to change you. You're one of us now. A vampire."

Bella holds his gaze, rising slowly from her crouch. Her eyes flit to Jasper, then back to him.

"How do you feel?" he asks

Her face is a mask, giving away nothing, but Jasper continues to read her feelings. "Her confusion is growing. She's not far from panicking," he thinks to Edward.

"Sweetheart," Edward says, reaching his hand toward her, "there's no need to panic. We're finally together, forever. Everything's going to be okay."

"Edward, she's barely holding it together," Jasper tells Edward through his thoughts.

"It's perfectly normal to feel unease, love. Those are your vampire senses. But, you're safe here. Neither Jasper nor I will harm you. You're safe. And we're together. Forever. Finally."

Taking in a big lungful of air, Bella finally speaks.

"I – " she stops immediately, clearly distracted by the sound of her own voice.

After a moment, she continues. "I don't know wha-. There's so much. It's overwhelming."

"Yes," Edward smiles at her, "there is a lot to take in." He takes a tentative step toward her. Then another. "I'll help you get used to it. We all will. Together you and I can get through anything," he assures her.

Jasper is alarmed by the level of emotions he feels coming from Bella. Newborns are notorious for wild mood swings, but this is different. She's nearing panic, with a healthy dose of confusion, but it's laced with something else. Is that – could it be abandonment? But that doesn't make sense. She knows they are right here with her. Edward, her mate, is right in front of her.

"I . . . I just don't know," Bella says. "I'm not sure about anything right now."

"That's perfectly fine, sweetheart," Edward replies. "Just know that I love you more than anything. You are my life."

Bella looks him right in the eyes. "But I don't know . . . you. I don't know any of you."

The words gut Edward and he staggers back a step. Jasper struggles to sort all the emotions flooding the room and manages to be the first to speak.

"That's fine, Bella. Things can be confusing for you as a newborn. It's nothing to worry about," he says confidently. "We're your family. Edward is your husband. You were married a few months ago. I'm Jasper. The others, who just left, are the rest of our family. You'll see them again later."

Edward finally gathers his wits enough to speak. "Yes, darling. We're your family. We were married in the backyard, right outside that window, earlier this summer. Then we had an indescribably wonderful honeymoon on Isle Esme." A nagging sense of fear takes root in his stomach and grows as she just looks at him blankly.

"Don't you remember any of that, love? Jasper or the others? Don't you . . . remember me?"

"I'm sorry, I –" Bella backs up as she speaks, ending up in the corner.

"Bella, I'm sure you're thirsty. Maybe we should hunt," Jasper suggests.

As soon as he mentions it, Bella notices the burn in her throat as it flares to an inferno and then it's all she can pay attention to. She paws at her throat.

"Will that help with this?" she rasps out.

"Yes," Edward and Jasper answer in unison.

"But I don't know how," she says.

"I'll teach you. You'll get the hang of it in no time," Edward says.

She's shaking her head before he's done speaking. "No! Not you."

"That's okay, Bella," says Jasper, "I'll take you and show you."

"Jasper!" Edward hisses angrily.

"Edward," Jasper replies through his thoughts, "something is going on with her and we don't know what. She needs to feed before we can get her to focus on anything else. That's what's important. You've got eternity to hunt with her. She needs help and isn't going to accept it from you right now. Let me help."

Edward clenches his jaw but reluctantly nods in agreement.

He steps back and watches forlornly as Jasper leads Bella to the window and jumps down to the back yard with her. He listens as they run to the forest, tracking Jasper's thoughts until they are out of range. Jasper assures him that he will keep Bella safe and do his best to determine why her behavior is so unexpected.

Then, Edward is surrounded by his family. Esme gives him a gentle hug as Carlisle squeezes his shoulder.

"What's going on, Carlisle?" he asks angrily. "She doesn't remember us. She doesn't remember me!"

"Everyone's transformation is different, son. You know this. And Bella never does what we expect," Carlisle says. "Let her hunt. Give her time to get a better handle on her thoughts and emotions. Jasper will find out what he can. When they return, we'll take it from there."

He is tense with anxiety but acknowledges Carlisle with a curt nod.

"Alice, do you see _anything?"_ he asks.

"I know Jazz is taking her into the northern end of Olympic National Forest to hunt, but that's because he made that decision. Ever since her transformation started, I haven't been able to see anything directly related to Bella's future. But I can tell you, my original vision hasn't changed. You and Bella, happy together. I don't know what's going on, but I'm sure it's going to turn out right."

"I'm going to go for a run; get some air," he says. "I'm sure I'll be back before they are."

"You want some company, bro?" Emmett asks.

"No. I actually need to be alone."

Rosalie walks to him and gives him a quick hug. "Hang in there. She loves you, Edward. Enough to give up her humanity to spend forever with you. You're mates, and nothing can change that fact," she whispers.

Edward appreciates her words and hugs her back before turning and running out of the house.

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**All things Twilight belong to S. Meyer. No infringement intended.**


	3. Chapter 3

Edward runs in the opposite direction as Jasper and Bella. He knows that if he starts after them, he won't be able to stop until he finds them.

First, he runs to Bella's house, stopping in the forest beyond her backyard to remember. He remembers watching her reading on a blanket on the lawn during a rare sunny day. She had fallen asleep and still he stood watching her. Watching her chest rise and fall with each breath. Noting how the sun brought out the mahogany highlights in her hair. Spending entirely too much time staring at her dusky pink lips, forming a perfect pout in her sleep.

He glances at her bedroom window. He knows her room looks very different now from when he used to climb through the window to watch her, and later to visit. All her belongings are at his family's home now. He's sure, though, that if he were to enter the room, it would still be saturated with her human scent.

He feels his control slipping. He almost gives in to the urge to enter the house, bury himself in her bed and lose himself in her scent. But the chief is home and Charlie thinks he and Bella are nearing the Mississippi as they drive cross-country on their way to college. He can't risk it, so he turns and runs to their meadow.

It's beautiful on this late summer day. The grass is tall, and the wildflowers are blooming. It's much like it was the first time he had brought Bella here. He walks to the spot where they had sat together and sits cross-legged, just like he had that day.

He fights his tendency towards negativity. Bella's steadfast love and her belief in him has done much to help him get away from those patterns. Hell, she's made him believe that he still has a soul. But under these circumstances it's hard not to give in to a hundred years of negativity and doubt.

Will she remember him? Their love? Was it a mistake to change her? As Rose said, she gave up her humanity to be with him, but now she doesn't even remember him. When she realizes what she gave up, will she regret it? Will she resent him? Has he lost her forever?

The pain he feels at this thought nearly breaks him. Both hands grab at his head, pulling his hair as a sob rips through him. And there – in the exact place where they had first declared their love for each other – Edward surrenders to despair. He weeps without tears. Cries out to whatever god there is in the universe. He gets up and runs to the clearing's edge where he uses his fists to chop down several trees, further destroying them once they fall to the ground until there is little more than sawdust left.

When he finally stops, he surveys the damage he's done and sighs deeply. None of this changes anything.

Bella is his mate, and he has promised to do whatever she needs. There was a time when he even said that he would leave if that's what she wanted. It would make him a shell of a man, but he would do it. If that's what she wanted.

He sinks to his knees on the ground, holding is head in his hands. If she doesn't remember him, she may well tell him to stay away. She may even find another man that she wants to be with. The anguish this thought causes him is excruciating. He lifts his head, intending again to curse the heavens above, but he stops when he sees someone standing across the clearing, watching him.

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**Twilight belongs to S. Meyer. No infringement intended.**


	4. Chapter 4

It's Rosalie, arms crossed, leaning against a tree.

"Are you done?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.

He tries to read her thoughts to determine her purpose in being here, but she's blocking him by reciting Emmett's new favorite rap lyrics. He makes a face at the crudeness of the words.

"What do you want, Rosalie? Are you going to give me another lecture on why Bella shouldn't have been turned? I think I'm learning the hard way that you may well have been correct!" His voice gets louder as he continues. "I also think I'm allowed to release some of this overwhelming pain at the realization that _my mate_ may be lost to me FOREVER!" He ends in a full-out shout.

Rosalie sighs and pushes off the tree, making her way to him at a leisurely pace. When she reaches him, she sinks gracefully to the ground to sit next to him.

"Edward, it's no secret that I wasn't in favor of Bella being changed. But that's because I thought her humanity – anyone's humanity – is too precious to give up willingly. Especially, to become what we are. It's not that I didn't want you to be happy or to enjoy the full depth of the mate bond."

He shifts to sit cross-legged next to her. "I know that, Rosalie. I just don't know what to do with this –" his hand hovers over his heart. "It hurts so much. I don't know where to put it all."

"Aren't you getting ahead of yourself?"

"What do you mean? I know you heard her, Rose. She doesn't even remember me!"

"Bella is always complicating things for us."

"Rose –" Edward says, warning her with his tone.

"No, you misunderstand," Rose insists. "Things have been a lot more exciting with her around. You have to admit that's true." She grins at him. After a moment he smiles back.

"That is certainly true," he says.

"I've appreciated that," she says matter-of-factly. "We're so often bored, but never with Bella around!" She takes a breath, diving into the reason why she tracked Edward here.

"The thing is, I'm not mad about her being turned."

"You're not?" he asks, surprised.

"Why should I be? I said my peace before. It was clear where I stood on the matter and she made her choice. It's over and done with now. What am I supposed to do, be pissed off at everyone for the next century or so for supporting her decision?"

"I admit, I believed that was a likely outcome," he says.

She smiles at him, then continues. "Edward, I'm not going to tell you anything you don't know. I am going to remind you of a few important things you're overlooking at the moment.

"When we change, though memories may fade, we still remain the people we were as humans. Our character is set, and you know any special talents come from enhancing gifts we had as humans."

"Rosalie, I really don't need a primer on vampire transformation right now."

"Apparently you do, Edward. Because what was the most dominant part of Bella's character when she was changed?"

He turns his gaze to the horizon as he considers the question. "I'm not sure I can pick one thing. She's brave. Stubborn. Sensitive. Forgiving –"

"Yes, yes, all of those things," Rosalie interrupts impatiently. "But you're missing the most important one. Her love. For you!"

Rosalie stands, hands on hips, and looks down at Edward. "She chose _you,_ Edward! She listened to me. I believe she considered my point of view, and she still chose to become one of us. Because she loves _you_. Because she wants to spend forever with _you_. She chose to give up her family, her friends, everything, for _you!_ No matter what else may or may not carry over from her human life, _that's _who Bella is. Edward, the mating bond is the most prevalent part of each of us. Rip that away, and we become shadows of ourselves. She _is_ your mate. She experienced that bond – as much as a human can – before she was changed. It will be stronger now."

"I don't know, Rosalie. What if she never remembers?"

"I swear to God, I want to smack you so hard right now!"

"What? Why?"

"Get your head out of your ass, Edward! She LOVES you. If she's forgotten; if the transformation scrambled her head in a way we haven't seen before; if wizards from the 6th dimension have cast a spell on her . . . SHE STILL LOVES YOU! Because that's _who she is_."

He stands, nodding now as he considers her words.

"You just need to help her remember. Hell, maybe you'll actually need to work for it this time. Instead of her simply falling at your feet." She narrows her eyes at him. "Do you have any idea how to woo a woman, Edward?"

He looks at her blankly.

"Be her friend first. Let her get to know you. Not the emo, depressing guy you were before Bella. But the smart, funny, talented, considerate man you are now. The man you were always meant to be."

"You really think that of me," he smiles at her.

"Stop. You know I love you."

"I love you, too, Rosalie."

"Thank you. And Bella loves you. You just have to remind her of that. Of who she is."

"You think it'll be that easy?" he asks, hopeful.

"I never said it would be easy, but I do think it is that simple."

For the first time since he watched Bella jump out the window with Jasper, he feels a spark of hope. He can do this. He can let her get to know him again. Help her remember.

"One other thing," Rosalie says. "You need to work on the stalker, controlling thing though. Just because you can read minds, doesn't give you permission to be overbearing."

"Don't stalk, control, or be overbearing. Got it. Easy."

"Right. Sure, it is," she says doubtfully. "Come on, let's get back to the house so you can clean up before Bella returns."

He nods and they turn, running towards home.

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**I'm off to work for a few hours, so the next update won't be up until later. What do you think so far?**

**Twilight belongs to S. Meyer. No infringement intended.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Let's see how things are going with Bella's first hunt . . .**

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Deep in the Olympic National Forest, far from where any humans wander, Jasper watches as Bella takes down her third deer and drains it efficiently. His military mind assesses her and recognizes her natural aptitude for their way of life. She watched him take down one buck, which he let her drink, then hunted the others with hardly any guidance from him. Her skill and grace astound even his jaded eye. After watching her, he finds he it's harder to remember the clumsy and accident-prone Bella they all knew. It's as though she was born to be a vampire and she is a joy to watch.

Once she is done with the carcass, he approaches her and helps bury it.

"Thank you," she says. "Not just for this," she gestures to the freshly turned earth, "but for showing me how to hunt."

"My pleasure, Bella. You're an exceptional student. A very quick study."

"Oh, uh, thanks, I guess."

"How are you feeling now?"

"Well, not thirsty anymore, thank goodness. Otherwise, fine, I guess."

"So, not feeling emotional, antsy, nervous?"

Bella glances around at their bucolic surroundings. Though the birds flew off as soon as she and Jasper entered the area, she can hear the burbling stream nearby and the breeze rustling the leaves. It's a beautiful and peaceful setting.

"Um…nooo? Should I?"

Jasper chuckles. "There's no right or wrong answer, Bella. I've been around a lot of newborns and there are certain behaviors that can be expected, but they're not requisite. I'm just trying to get a handle on how you're doing."

"Oh. Fine, thanks."

"Fine." He repeats with a grin.

She nods at him.

"Come sit with me." He walks to a nearby boulder, leaping to the top and sitting down. Bella follows him, leaning back on her elbows and raising her face to the sun.

"Hmmm, it's so nice here," she murmurs.

"That it is," he says. "Bella, what do you remember?"

"Remember? About what?"

"About anything."

"The transformation was excruciating! I'd like to forget about that. But I know that I won't. Not ever. It's strange, I'm not sure what things I remember and what things I just know. Then, the things I know, I'm not sure how I know them. Does that make any sense?"

"I think so. Give me an example."

"Well, I know we're vampires, and that we used to be human. I know most humans don't believe in vampires. I know that most vampires drink from humans but that you and your family don't." She pauses a moment before continuing. "I know that's very unusual. But I also know, absolutely, that's how I want to live. But I don't know how I know any of that. I think I remember a father and a mother, but I'm not sure, those thoughts are very murky. I have a feeling of being loved. Of being greatly loved . . ." she trails off.

Jasper waits patiently, expecting her to talk of her bond with Edward. Frankly, he's never felt a mate bond as strong as theirs. It's even more intense than his bond with Alice. As usual, Bella surprises him by going along a different train of thought.

"I also have a feeling of being sad. I think about my parents. Of not wanting to hurt them."

"Yes, I understand why you would feel that way. That was the most difficult part of your decision about when and how to undergo your transformation."

They sit quietly on the boulder, gazing at their surroundings.

"Bella, can I ask you some questions?" he probes.

"Sure." She shrugs her shoulder as she digs abstract designs in the boulder's surface with her finger.

"You don't feel that you know any of us?"

She closes her eyes as she considers the question. It is several minutes before she replies.

"No. But even though I don't remember any of you, like I said, I know things. I know I'm supposed to be with you, as part of your family. I know I'm safe with you. I know this is something I wanted – no, needed. Desperately. Like if I wasn't changed, my entire life would just be . . . wrong."

"I see. So, it's like you're meeting us for the first time?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Well," he chuckles and stands as he speaks, "for vampires, hunting together can be quite a bonding experience. So, I guess I should formally introduce myself, I'm Jasper Whitlock, at your service, ma'am." He bends in an elegant bow.

Bella laughs at his theatrics. "I'm pretty sure there's a story there."

"Ah, my entire life story. Yes, indeed. Originally from the South and a major in the Civil War. We can talk about that all you'd like another time. For now, let me fill you in on the rest of the family. My wife, Alice, is the tiny one. You and she are best friends. Carlisle, the blond one, is the one we consider our father. He's the leader of the coven. His wife, Esme, is the one with the long dark hair. You've grown close to her. The big, muscle-bound fellow is Emmett. Rosalie, with the long blond hair is his wife."

"And Edward? He made some pretty . . . specific . . . remarks before we left to hunt."

Jasper laughs. "Yes, he did." He takes a deep breath and dives into what he suspects will be a touchy subject. "He's your husband, Bella. He loves you very much. You –"

"Wait. Stop right there!" she demands, jumping to her feet and staring down at him, hands on hips and eyes flashing. "Husband? How can I be married to someone I have no memory of? And I have no memory of Edward. Absolutely none. And I'm sure I never wanted to get married. I don't know how I know that, but I do! How can I be _married_? To someone I don't even know?"

Jasper stands with her and gently grasps her arms. "Relax, Bella. We'll figure this out." He looks in her eyes, sending calming vibes her way, and together they take a couple of deliberate breaths. "There, now," he says, releasing her arms and stepping back.

"It was quite a challenge for Edward to convince you to marry him," he says.

"Wait, do you think he forced me into it? Or tricked me? He's seems like a bit of a controlling creeper! I could totally imagine him doing something like that."

"Bella," he sighs, his tone tinged with chastisement, "If you don't remember him, then what you know of him is based on three minutes of interaction that happened after he'd been worrying over you for two-and-a-half days. Is it really fair to base your judgment of him on that?"

She has the grace to look a little ashamed. "No, I guess not."

"Though, to be fair," Jasper continues lightly, "he can be overbearing. And overprotective when it comes to you." He pauses trying to guess her reaction to his next comment. "We all can be when it comes to our _mates_."

She nods for a moment, acknowledging that she hears him, then she freezes. "Wait. What do you mean 'mates'? We're not dogs! We're people, we don't 'mate'!"

"You're very correct that we're not dogs, but, as vampires, a lucky few of us do experience the mating bond. It is . . . life altering. Vampires are generally unchanging. Except when we fall in love. That is a shift in us that is so great, so deep, it can never be broken. When a vampire falls in love, the bond is permanent. Eternal."

"And you're saying that's, that's how Edward feels about me?" she asks nervously.

"Yes. Not only that, but you feel the same about him." He raises his hand to forestall her impending interruption. "I know that you don't remember it, but that doesn't make it any less true."

"I _never_ wanted to get married. I can't imagine it. Are you telling me we did the whole gig: church filled with people, long white dress, minister, party afterwards?"

He grins at her. "Well, not in a church. Like Edward said, you were married in the backyard."

"Aargh!" she huffs and turns her back on him.

"Listen, Bella, I think, and this is from conversations we've had in the past, your reluctance to get married was born of the fact that your parents divorced. Your dad struggled with that for many years and your mom, well, she was never at a loss for company. I think you just never saw it working and thought it wasn't in the cards for you. But let me tell you what changed your mind—"

He walks in front of her and turns to face her, looking directly in her eyes. "It was your love for Edward. He's rather – old-fashioned – and marriage was very important to him. You were adamant in your desire to be changed because you wanted to spend eternity with him. Because of how much you love him. You realized that, not only would it make Edward ridiculously happy," he says, rolling his eyes, "but if you were already prepared to spend forever with him, taking the step to get married didn't seem like such a big deal."

"That makes sense, I guess. I know that this," she waves up and down her body, "feels right. For the first time ever. It feels like I'm finally who I was always supposed to be. But Jasper, why don't I remember anything? If my feelings for Edward are so strong, why don't I remember them? Why don't I feel them now?"

"I honestly don't know, Bella. I've seen innumerable transformations and, while human memories become murky and can eventually fade, we usually bring certain knowledge and memories with us into our lives as vampires. But we'll figure it out. Carlisle is a brilliant physician. Edward and Rosalie are pretty talented in that area, too. I'm confident we'll find the answer. In the meantime, maybe you should just focus on adjusting to your new life and getting to know us all? We're a built-in family, guaranteed to love you. You already know that we all like you. Well, you might have to start from scratch with Rosalie. She never particularly liked you, but I think she'll come around."

"Okay, make new friends, but be careful around blondie, got it."

"And I'll talk to Edward. See if he can take it down a couple of notches. He's always been intense though, especially with you. Try to cut him some slack, okay?"

"Okay. Thank you, Jasper."

"You're most welcome, Bella. Now, we should head back. I'm sure Edward has probably pulled out half of his hair by now!"

They jump down from the rock and start to run in the direction of home.

"Do you remember anything else about vampires in general?" Jasper asks her as they run.

"Well, our senses are enhanced. We're very strong and fast. And our brains can process things much faster than humans."

"That's all true, but do you remember that some of us have special talents?"

"What? You mean like playing the violin?"

He laughs heartily. "Not exactly. Let me explain . . ."

* * *

**Let me know what you think.**


	6. Chapter 6

Most of their run home is filled with her questioning him about their abilities. He tells her when they're about to enter Edward's mind-reading range and they switch their conversation to the types of flora and fauna in the area. Upon learning of Edward's ability, Bella asked Jasper if he could prevent Edward from learning about their private conversation and this was the tact Jasper suggested. He's sure Edward is in his head this very moment watching every movement Bella makes, but at least their conversation will be inconsequential. And frustrating to Edward. A fact that Jasper finds amusing.

Edward meets them in the back yard of their home.

"Are you feeling better after your hunt, Bella?" he inquires.

"Yes, much, thank you."

"She's a natural, Edward. Watched me once and then took down three more kills flawlessly by herself," Jasper offers as he replays the memories in his mind for Edward's benefit.

Edward smiles broadly. "Of course, she is. I never expected anything less."

They walk toward the house, Edward fighting the urge to wrap his arm around Bella as Jasper warns him through his thoughts to keep his distance.

"She's going through a lot right now, Edward. Just give her time and a bit of space, brother," he thinks.

"Well," Edward says as they reach the back deck, "the rest of the family is anxious to see and talk to you, Bella. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, sure. That's fine," she replies, biting her lip nervously. Edward smiles at the endearing habit that has carried over from her human life and ushers her into the house.

They enter the living room to find the others waiting for them. Carlisle and Esme stand together near the fireplace. Rosalie and Emmett are seated on one of the sofas and Alice skips across the room to Jasper, giving him a quick kiss and snuggling into his side.

"Hi, Bella," she says cheerily. "You look wonderful!"

"Thanks, um, Alice," she replies with just a moment's hesitation.

"Don't worry. Everything's going to turn out just the way it's supposed to," Alice assures her, giving Bella's arm a comforting squeeze before pulling Jasper to the other sofa.

"It seems some introductions are in -"

"Um, I wanted to thank you all –" Edward and Bella start to speak at the same time.

She looks at Edward. "It's okay, I can handle it from here."

Edward dips his head and takes a small step away from her. His face shows no sign of the fact that his brothers are finding great humor in Bella confidently taking charge of the conversation. He does note, however, a growing respect toward Bella in Rosalie's thoughts. He looks at her, raising an eyebrow. She merely rolls her eyes at him and turns her attention to Bella.

"So, thank you, Jasper, for taking me on my first hunt. I feel much better now."

"You're welcome," he replies.

"And thank you all for everything you've done to help me through my change. I'll tell you some of what Jasper and I have talked about. Most importantly, it seems I have no memory of my life before I was changed. I have impressions, beliefs, feelings, but no memories."

"Human memories always become dim and hard to remember after the change," Carlisle offers. "Without a concerted effort to remember them, they can fade away completely in time. That's not unusual or anything to worry about," he says in a comforting tone.

"Oh, I understand that. Jasper explained as much. It's just that, I really don't remember anything. Any . . . one." She glances at Edward sheepishly before turning to the rest of them. "Any of you."

She gestures to Alice. "I know you're Alice because Jasper described all of you to me, and your relationships to one another. He says you and I were very close, but, I'm sorry, I don't remember that."

"It's okay, Bella," Alice reassures her. "I told you, everything will turn out just fine."

"I'm glad you're so confident of that," Bella replies.

"Bella, you really don't remember anything?" Carlisle asks.

"The first thing I recall is the terrible pain of my transformation." They all nod knowingly at that. "Nothing before that."

"What about Edward? Your parents? Your wedding or honeymoon?" Carlisle presses.

Bella huffs out a laugh. "Jasper said you would jump right into trying to figure this out. I'm glad. I want to figure it out too. But, let me tell you what I do know. And I think Edward and I should talk privately. Then you can poke and prod all you want."

"Fair enough," Carlisle concedes.

"So, though I don't remember any of you, I do believe that this is where I'm supposed to be."

"It is, dear," Esme says with emotion. "This is exactly where you are supposed to be, with us. Your family."

"Thank you," Bella replies. "I feel safe here. Not threatened like I know I should be in a room with seven other unknown vampires." She tries to make a joke of it, but it falls flat as the others all think of Edward.

She clears her throat. "Anyway, I'd like to stay. I'd like to get to know all of you as I adjust to this life. I mean, even though I don't remember my human life, I know I have a lot to learn about being a vampire."

"Oh, we're in little sis!" Emmett says enthusiastically. "Can't wait to show you some of the cool things you can do now!"

Bella smiles at him before turning to Edward. "Well, I guess we should talk. Is there any place we can talk privately?"

"You both stay here," Carlisle offers. "Emmett and Rosalie were going to hunt with me and Esme."

"And I'm taking Jasper into Port Angeles to look at a storefront I'm thinking of renting. You have the house to yourselves until tomorrow morning!"

"Oh, okay then," Bella replies, surprised at their quick retreat from the house. Within minutes the entire family is gone, and she's alone with Edward.

* * *

**Alone with Edward - what could possibly happen?**


	7. Chapter 7

"Perhaps you'd like to clean up from your hunt?" he offers.

She looks down at herself. There's a little blood on the front of her shirt and her hands and knees are covered in dirt.

"Oh! Yes, I guess I should. I'm sorry if I tracked dirt in –"

"Don't. You didn't, that's not why I'm offering. And you can hardly tell you've been hunting. Pretty amazing for a first hunt. You should have seen Emmett after his first outing. What a mess! I thought you might be more comfortable, that's all."

"Oh, okay. Yes, I'd appreciate that."

"This way." He leads her to the staircase and up to their third floor bedroom, opening the door before stepping aside so she can enter.

She takes a few steps into the room and stops, gazing at all the belongings on the shelves. They are primarily Edward's. Since the family was refurbishing a cottage at the rear of the property for them, Bella hadn't felt the need to unpack many of her things before they moved there.

"This – this is your room," she says.

"Actually," he dashes past her and picks up a something from the desk. He continues without turning to face her. "Actually, it's _our_ room. The bathroom is through that door," he says, pointing over his shoulder. "All your toiletries are in there. Your clothes are on the left side of the closet as well as in the left-hand drawers of the dresser. I'll give you some privacy" He turns and takes a step toward the door when suddenly Bella is blocking his way, with a firm hand on his chest.

"What's that?" she asks, tapping the back of the picture he's clutching.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think about this being here. I don't want to make you uncomfortable and you're probably not ready for –"

Her finger presses against his lips, stopping him from continuing. "Edward, this is your home. You don't have to move things because of me." She slowly lowers her hand.

"It's your home, too," he says, softly.

She smiles at him. "So, what's in the frame?"

He watches her face as he turns it toward her, revealing the candid photo of them from their wedding day. It's his favorite because of the way they were looking at each other as he held her close on the dance floor. The color was high on her cheeks, her smile radiant, and she was leaning into him just so. He kissed her a moment later, putting all his love into the connection between their lips, willing her to understand – to truly know – how much he loved her. For all of eternity.

"Oh." She is taken aback by the photo. Not so much the subjects, but the look of pure, unadulterated love on his face. And the fact that it is reflected back to him on her face. "That's me."

"Yes. That's us. The day you made me the happiest man who ever lived," he says softly.

"Wow. I look . . ." She stops, biting her lip.

"What?"

"I look very much in love. Not the least bit coerced."

He chuckles. "Well, I did have to ask you several times." He turns serious. "But I never would have coerced you into marrying me. I didn't want you to be married to me if that's not what you wanted."

"Jasper said it was really important to you. Why? Why was it so important to you that we get married?"

He sighs and glances away from her. "I've done many things in my life that I'm not proud of. Broken laws, rules, commandments." He smiles shyly at her. "I know you don't remember this, but we were both virgins when we wed."

She's surprised by this. "Okay. But aren't you, like, really old?"

He chuckles. "One hundred and nineteen."

"So, yeah, really old. But you never . . ."

"No, never. I was changed at 17 and didn't have a sweetheart before then. Though it would have been a high scandal to ruin a girl's reputation that way back then, it did happen now and again. Then, after I was changed, with my mind reading, I never found a woman I was interested in. So, no. Never. When we met and fell in love, I wanted that one social convention from my time to remain unbroken. I wanted us to be bound together in every way before we took the final step of giving ourselves to each other sexually."

"I see."

"After nearly a century of believing myself a soulless monster, you made me believe that I had a soul again. That led to all sorts of theological thoughts and lengthy conversations with Carlisle. If I had a soul, then there must be a God and perhaps I'm not completely forsaken, after all. If that is true, then it means something to honor Him by giving you the sanctity of a marriage vow. We had already confessed our love to one another. And you had made it clear that you wanted to be changed for us to have forever together. A marriage might seem small in comparison, but, in the end, it meant something to me. When you realized that, you agreed. Quite of your own free will."

"That's -. Gosh, that's a lot to process."

"I apologize. Time is one thing we have plenty of, so there will be other chances to cover all of that. Why don't you shower? Take your time. Relax. I'll be waiting for you downstairs when you're done."

"Okay. Thank you, Edward."

"You're welcome." He puts the frame back on the desk, then smiles at her before leaving the room, closing the door gently behind him.

* * *

**"But aren't you, like, really old?" *snicker***


	8. Chapter 8

A short while later, Edward turns as Bella comes down the stairs. He's standing by the window staring out the yard as twilight falls. Within minutes of coming downstairs earlier he learned a new form of torture as he heard her undressing, then turning on the shower and his mind quickly turned to imagining how she looked in there. As soon as his thoughts took that turn, he focused intently on the colors of the sky as dusk fell and worked diligently to keep his thoughts away from Bella.

Now, though, he can loosen the tight rein on his thoughts as he watches her walk gracefully down the steps, dressed comfortably in jeans and a hoodie.

"I can't believe your transformation was completed just today. Your control is extraordinary," he says.

"I literally just hunted with Jasper!" she laughs, but then her face falls. "Wait, how often should I be doing that?"

"You're fine, love. You probably should hunt every day or so for now, just to keep your thirst under control. Generally, we try to hunt every week or ten days, though we can go longer. That's not what I meant though. You seem to have your enhanced abilities under control. It's not uncommon for newborns to need time to acclimate to their speed and strength. The first months after Emmett's transformation included a lot of broken furniture and holes in walls."

"Wow. For months?"

He nods with a grimace.

"I can't promise I won't break anything," she says, looking worried.

"No one's asking you to. In fact, it's sort of expected, so don't feel badly if something happens."

"Okay."

"Would you like to sit?" he asks, gesturing to the sofa.

"Um, sure." She steps past him and sits stiffly on the edge of the cushion. Edward sits at the end of the sofa, giving her space. His anxiety is clear, though, as he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, clasping his hands together.

"So, you don't remember anything?" he asks softly.

"I don't. I'm sorry Edward." She plays with her engagement ring on her finger. "You must really love me a lot though!" she jokes, staring at all the diamonds.

He smiles. "More than you can imagine, Bella. Though the ring is an heirloom. It was my mother's."

She stops fidgeting with the ring and looks at him. "I imagine I knew that . . . before."

"Yes. Yes, you did."

"So, can you read my mind now?" She stares almost comically into his eyes.

He laughs. "It doesn't quite work that way, love. I generally don't have to try so intently to read one's thoughts. But yours remain as silent to me as ever."

"Oh." She says, relieved at this news.

"Jasper filled you in our special abilities, then."

"Yes. You can read minds. Well, all but mine, it would appear. Alice can see the future based on someone's decisions. And he's an empath, who can influence emotions."

"That's right. Though I would argue that Carlisle's compassion, Esme's ability to love passionately, Rosalie's tenacity, and Emmett's great strength, are all unusual among our kind. They could be equally qualified as gifts."

Bella chuckles and he looks at her questioningly.

"Sorry. I wasn't laughing at what you said. It's just, when Jasper asked me if I knew about vampires having special talents, I asked if he meant like playing the violin! Seems ridiculous to me now."

"Not so ridiculous. With our ability to learn and our physical dexterity, any of us could become virtuoso musicians if we chose. Rosalie is a talented pianist."

"Really? And what about you, Edward? Are you a musician, too?"

He nods slowly. "I play a few instruments, though piano is my favorite. I like the classics."

"Hmm. Would that be classic rock? Classic blues? Maybe classic country?"

He chuckles. "Not quite, though I do have favorites in each of those categories. I meant classic _classical_."

"Ah . . . _that_ classic." She pauses a moment. "So, what is your favorite classic classical?"

"My number one would be Clare de Lune."

"Clare de Lune. Clare de Lune. I feel like I should know that. Should I know that?"

"In addition to it being a piece I would play for you, you said your mother used to play it often while you were growing up. It goes like this . . ."

He starts humming and Bella closes her eyes, getting lost in the beautiful tones of his voice.

He stops after a few moments. "Would you like me to play it for you?"

Her eyes fly open, and she looks at him, excited. "Yes."

He stands and holds his hand out to her, leading her to the grand piano in the corner. He sits on the bench as she stands awkwardly beside him.

"You can sit next to me," he offers gently. "You usually do and . . . and I find it quite comforting."

She bites her lip, considering this, then slides gracefully onto the bench beside him. He shoots her a grin and begins playing. Before long, he is lost in the music, closing his eyes as he plays, but never missing a note.

She watches him, taking in his handsome profile. Noting the occasional creases of his brow. The bobbing of is Adam's apple when he swallows. Without realizing it, she's leaning toward him, inhaling deeply.

The music stops, and he freezes, still as a statue.

"I'm so sorry!" she says, quickly leaning back.

"Why did you do that?" he asks softly, looking straight ahead. She wishes she knew him better because it almost looks as if he is in pain.

"I – I'm not sure, except," she huffs, rolling her eyes at herself, "except I really like the way you smell."

She watches the corner of his mouth curl up in a smile and he turns very slowly to face her.

"It's perfectly all right," he says. Slowly, he raises his hand and gently sweeps her hair over her shoulder. Then, watching to gauge her reaction, he leans toward her a bit and inhales deeply.

"I've always loved your scent. Even more so now that you're a vampire," he says softly, before pulling away.

"But don't you –" she stops, confused by what she was thinking.

"Don't I what?"

"I don't know why I was going to ask you this, but don't you miss the scent of my blood?"

Suddenly, he's filled with hope and joy. This, _this_, is a topic they talked about several times. He can't help but believe that somewhere in her mind she does remember who she is. Who they are. He smiles as he answers.

"It's a worry you had before your transformation. Your blood smelled sweet to all of us, but it was particularly appealing to me. Once in a great while, a vampire will cross paths with a human whose blood is so perfect for them it's virtually irresistible. La tua cantante. It means –"

"Your singer," Bella interrupts, a shiver running down her spine. "I don't know why, but I have awful feelings associated with that phrase. Fear – no, terror." She turns to look at him. "I don't understand."

He hangs his head, shaking it slightly side-to-side. "That's not my proudest moment," he murmurs.

"Tell me?" she urges.

"I was so proud of you, though," he says, looking into her eyes fervently. "You were so brave and courageous in the face of such monstrosity."

"Now you _have _to tell me!" she demands.

"There was a time when we were separated."

She looks at him quizzically, her eyebrows pulled together in confusion. "Okay?"

He huffs. "I'm sorry. I'm being cowardly and not owning up to all my horrible decisions." He stands and starts pacing in front of the piano.

"There was a time when I thought it was too dangerous for you, as a human, to be part of our world. There was a tiny little accident. Something that would be inconsequential in your human life, but Jasper almost killed you because of it. I made the decision – unilaterally, without ever discussing it with you or anyone else. I decided that we had to leave Forks and leave you in order to keep you safe. It was a terrible decision –"

"Terrible?" she interrupts. "It also sounds misogynistic, egotistical – let the big strong man make decisions about the poor, weak woman and what's best for her without asking. Is that really who you are, Edward?"

He cringes at the question, but forges ahead. "I admit that is who I was. Those were some of my biggest flaws. That was pointed out to me in various . . . creative . . . ways by each member of my family. And by you. But you, Bella, you made me a better man. Helped me to give up some control, trust you and others, and enjoy life. I owe you everything, Bella. Indeed, I owe you my life. Please believe me, that's not who I am anymore."

She purses her lips, considering what he's said. "Well, sadly, I don't know if you are or not. You'll just have to prove to me who you are. But continue your story."

"While I may have believed that you would be better off without me, you weren't. It was a very difficult time. Then, Alice had a vision of you, and we believed you had died. I couldn't bear to be in a world without you, so I went to Italy to see the Volturi."

"I feel like I should know that name."

"The Volturi are the ruling family of the vampire world. I intended to break one of their cardinal laws. I was going to reveal myself to humans, right under their noses, so they would have no choice but to end me."

She gasps. "Edward!"

"Alice saw my decision. She was already on her way to Forks to find out what really happened to you. When she found you alive, she begged you to help her stop me. You both flew to Italy, and you stopped me mere moments before I committed the crime. But the Volturi were already involved. You had to come with Alice and me to meet them. One of them, Jane, has a gift where she can torture you just by her thoughts. The pain is . . . indescribable."

"Wait, she did that to you?"

"Yes. And she tried to do that to you, but it didn't work."

"What? Why?"

"We don't know. Carlisle's theory is that whatever keeps your mind silent to me also blocked Jane. Anyway, miraculously, they allowed us to leave."

"Why was that miraculous?"

"Our most important law is that we are not to reveal our true nature to humans. That's why my plan would have resulted in a quick execution. The fact that you, as a human, knew about us, also violated that law. They could have killed all of us. Instead, Aro was intrigued by you. He has a gift similar to mine. He must be touching the person, but when he does, he has access to all the thoughts and memories of that person. When he saw you in my mind, he knew you were my singer. He called you La Tua Cantante. Just seeing you in my mind made him thirsty. For a moment I thought he might try to drink from you, but then it passed. However, he'll want to meet you as a vampire one day."

"And Aro is the one in charge?"

"That's right. Anyway, they let us go and we came back here. Then, I experienced an even bigger miracle: you forgave me. You gave me another chance."

"Oh." She doesn't know how else to respond. Clearly, she must have loved him greatly to risk her life to save his. But she remembers none of it.

"Can you tell me more, about my life from before?"

He smiles, leaning his elbows on the piano. "Of course. What would you like to know?"

"Tell me about my parents."

He nods and starts telling her about Charlie and Renee. They talk throughout the night, Edward answering all her questions and telling her all he knows about family, friends, and their relationship.

* * *

**So, what do you think?**


	9. Chapter 9

As dawn breaks, flooding the great room with morning sunshine, the others return from hunting. Carlisle wastes no time trying to ascertain what may be the cause of Bella's complete memory loss. In between his questioning, whenever he darts to his library to research something, someone else monopolizes her time. Esme mothers her and shares some insights into Renee by relaying conversations they had leading up to and during Bella and Edward's wedding. Rose is even warm toward Bella, taking her on a tour of the garage and explaining her love of motorized vehicles. After talking for at least an hour about why nuclear physics was his favorite college degree thus far, Emmett loses spectacularly to Bella in all three rounds of the arm wrestling contests they undertake.

Finally, as afternoon wanes, Carlisle makes a suggestion. "I'd like to call Eleazar and invite he and Carmen for a visit. Perhaps he can offer some insight."

After explaining who they are, Bella agrees, and he makes the call. Just as he hangs up, Alice and Jasper return home from Port Angeles.

As night falls, Alice suggests she, Jasper and Edward take Bella for a run. As Edward hesitates, Alice sends her thoughts his way. "Let's show her the perks of being a vampire, Edward! We can hunt on our way back." she thinks excitedly.

Within moments, the four take off like bullets into the forest, Edward leading the way and Bella keeping pace with him. She revels in the joy of the run, dodging trees without a thought and seeing every detail of the forest at night. As they approach the Canadian border, Edward skids to a stop in a clearing and they all join him, taking in the crystal clear night sky that offers them a stunning view of the Milky Way.

"Oh my!" Bella whispers. "I hope you have never grown tired of this! It's stunning!"

"That it is, Bella," Jasper replies.

"I knew you'd love it," Alice offers.

They stay in the clearing, watching the stars, and then the sunrise. On their way home, as Alice suggested, they hunt; primarily for Bella's sake. They arrive home mid-afternoon the next day to find that Carmen and Eleazar have already arrived.

"When Carlisle called and explained the particular conundrum you are facing, we decided to come right away," Eleazar explains.

"Hello, Bella," Carmen says. "It is lovely to see you again."

Bella accepts her hug awkwardly. "I'm sorry, but have we met before?" she asks.

"Yes, mi querido, at your wedding!" Carmen replies.

"I'm sorry, but I don't remember."

"Don't worry. De nada, Bella!"

"This is very interesting," Eleazar murmurs.

"What's that?" Carlisle asks.

"She is a shield. I don't know why I didn't see it before, at the wedding. She must be a strong one, too, if she was able to block Edward as a human."

"Not just me," Edward says, "But Jane, and Aro, too."

"Dios mio!" Eleazar exclaims. "This is true?"

"Yes. Aro couldn't read her mind and Jane's attempt to use her power on Bella failed completely," Edward explains.

"So, a shield?" Bella asks. "What does that mean? How does it work?"

"It is a defensive gift. You have been able to keep Edward, Aro, and Jane out. That is no small feat. Clearly it keeps you safe from being impacted by those particular gifts. Beyond that, we will have to find out."

So, they begin experimenting. They find that Bella is not immune to Jasper's gift, and they all offer theories as to why that might be. Eleazar challenges Bella to try to expand her gift to keep Jasper's power from affecting her.

"Aargh!" Bella laughs. She's frustrated, but that is overcome by the wave of amusement Jasper hits her with. "I don't think I can do this!"

"Don't give up," says Jasper. "I've never seen a gift that can't be projected in one way or another. Have you, Eleazar?"

"Well, the only other shield I've known is Renata and all gifts work differently. But she can extend her projection somewhat beyond herself," Eleazar replies.

"But how? I don't even know how to start!" Bella grumbles.

"Perhaps I know someone who can help. I'll see if I can arrange a meeting," he says, walking off.

The very next day Kate, one of the other members of the Denali coven, comes to visit. Eleazar wastes no time putting Bella to work with Kate. They find that she is immune to Kate's power, a psychic electrokinesis that allows her to create an electric current over her skin.

Kate coaches Bella. "It took me years for my talent to develop fully," she explains. "At first it was just in my fingers, but I was able to stretch it so that I can do it across my body now. Try to imagine what your shield looks like. Pay attention to what it feels like. Imagine pushing it out or stretching it beyond yourself."

Over the next couple of weeks, they practice for hours every day. When they take breaks, Bella spends time with other members of the family. Rose teaches her about cars. She even gives her some high-speed driving lessons, both for the fun of it and because she finds it hilarious that Edward paces with worry the entire time they are on the road.

"Relax, bro," Emmett says with a laugh, clapping a heavy hand on Edward's shoulder, "she's practically indestructible now!"

Carlisle teaches Bella vampire history and, because she's interested, even shares his medical textbooks.

Bella spends time with Esme in her garden and talking about the architectural and interior design work she's done.

Jasper shares his personal story with her, telling about being changed during the civil war by a vampire named Maria. He shares how he was commanded to cruelly destroy vampires after they had served her purposes. He tells how, with his gift, he would feel all the emotions of every creature as he destroyed it. He speaks of how much he loves his life now, compared to then; his joy of being with Alice. His appreciation for the lifestyle Carlisle has created for them all.

Emmett's vibrancy and love of life is a revelation for Bella. He shows her several amazing things her vampire traits allow her to do now. Things like leaping rivers, jumping to rooftops and swimming underwater without having to breathe. Their outings always enriched by serious conversations about many subjects that Bella finds herself wanting to study.

Alice enjoys Bella's company whenever she is able. Bella appreciates spending quiet time with someone who simply is a friend.

Then there is Edward. Bella guesses that he's working very hard to keep himself carefully controlled. He's always nearby but doesn't demand her attention or force her to spend time with him. He's pleasant, amusing, and a charming conversationalist. Bella is beginning to feel conflicted because she can see what a wonderful man he is, yet she doesn't feel anything for him beyond the affection and appreciation that she feels for all the Cullens. Plus, she can't help but believe that it must be painful for him to be with her every day knowing that she doesn't return his affection.

She finds that she enjoys the routine they've all established. Training, interspersed with time spent individually or in groups. They hunt and sometimes spend entire nights racing into Canada and back. She's yet to beat Edward, even with her newborn strength, but is always a close second. She signs up for online courses, reveling in how quickly her vampire brain allows her to learn new things.

One day, Alice and Bella are planting flowers in the garden when Alice freezes and gets a far off look on her face.

"The Volturi are coming," she says. In that moment, Edward flashes to their side from where he had been composing at the piano.

"What do you mean? What exactly did you see?" he asks urgently. All the others appear in the garden as they overhear the conversation.

"I saw Aro deciding to send Alec and Jane to check on Bella. He wants to make sure we've kept our word - that she's been changed."

"Isn't it overkill to send two of his most valuable members of the guard?" Jasper asks. "Anyone could come by to verify that she's been changed. It'd be a quick trip."

"It is odd," Carlisle says. "Eleazar, what do you make of it?"

"Well, if The Three and their wives are safely ensconced in Voltura, they can spare some highly skilled guards. But still, it's unusual. Aro has no reason to expect resistance from your family, does he, Carlisle?"

"No, not at all."

"Maybe they're not expecting resistance," Jasper muses. "Maybe it's not really an observational visit."

"What does that mean?" Bella asks.

"Perhaps it's more of an acquisition."

"Yes," Eleazar says, rubbing his brow as he thinks. "You must allow them to see for themselves that Bella has been changed. If you do not, the law would allow them to destroy your entire coven. But once they are here – the witch twins, those with the most immobilizing gifts – and are welcomed into your home, what is to stop them from simply taking what Aro wants?"

"What does Aro want?" Bella asks.

"Me, for starters," Edward says. "And Alice. He's wanted the two of us to be part of his guard for a long time."

"He may very well desire Bella, too," Eleazar remarks. "He has experienced her ability as a human and may correctly theorize that she will be a formidable vampire."

"Th-They can do that?" Bella asks.

"Aro is eccentric. That may not be his goal. He may simply wish to give a show of force. We are the largest coven outside of Voltura. Perhaps it's a simple reminder that he is the one in power," Carlisle offers.

"Of course, that is a possibility," Eleazar concurs. "But, unless Alice gets a clearer vision of his purpose, we cannot know for sure."

"We need to prepare for any contingency," Jasper states strongly. "Alice, any idea when they will arrive?"

"In my vision, the trees are just starting to change color. Perhaps five or six weeks from now?" she replies.

"That gives us very little time to train for a fight," Jasper says, pacing.

"It may not come to that, Jasper," Carlisle says. "If they really are coming just to confirm that Bella has been changed, we don't want to provoke them."

"But we can't just have them in our midst without a plan –"

The heated discussion continues with everyone having their say, trying to determine the best way to handle a visit from Alec and Jane. Over several days, a plan is made. One that receives the Volturi graciously so they can meet Bella, but also, hopefully, provides a line of defense if the visit is more than just a visit.

At Carlisle's insistence, the Denali coven will return home before the Volturi arrive. "We're not preparing for war," he says. "If they are already on edge because of the size of our family, having more friends here could just provoke them."

"Very well, my friend," Eleazar says. "But we will stay as long as we can. Perhaps Kate and I can push Bella to a breakthrough with her shield."

* * *

**I don't speak Spanish, but I can use Google Translate like nobody's business. My apologies if the phrases are not correct. So "they're coming . . ." dun, dun, dun...**


	10. Chapter 10

For her part, Bella works harder than ever. Emmett and Jasper teach her physical fighting as Edward watches nervously. Jasper focuses on strategic fighting while Emmett shows her strength moves. Together it is a powerful combination.

Bella works with Kate every day. She's frustrated with her inability to change anything with her shield. Then one day, as she's trying to visualize her shield and push it off her hand, she feels a strange sensation, almost like a rubber band releasing from her hand. As she stares, concentrating intently, she sees a slight shimmer. It surprises her so much that she lets out a squeal of excitement. At the moment she does so, it snaps back, tight to her skin. She's excited, and she and Kate hurry to tell the others of this breakthrough.

Her first success spurs her on to try even harder. Alice and Edward must work hard to get her to take breaks.

One day, as she and Alice are out for a quick hunt close to home, Bella shares that she's been thinking about Edward.

"I'm not sure if I'm starting to remember things, but I had this feeling of happiness. I felt like I was with Edward. I don't specifically remember anything, it's just a feeling I have of being with him."

"Oh, Bella! You and Edward were happy. So, very happy together!"

"But I don't know that. I had a moment of feeling something, but that's it."

"Well, maybe things are coming back to you slowly. You should tell Carlisle. And Edward."

"No, not Edward. I don't want to get his hopes up. Or for him to get the wrong idea."

"What would be the wrong idea?"

"That we are ever going to be what we were."

"But – "

"No. Alice, I refuse to lead him on. He's been so kind and patient. I genuinely like him. I like all of you and I'm grateful for all you've done to help me get used to my new life. I just - I just don't want to be the source of disappointment or pain for him. For any of you."

Alice smiles sadly at her. "Okay, I understand. I won't say anything to him. And I can make sure he doesn't learn of this conversation in my thoughts, too. You should talk to Carlisle, though.

"I will."

* * *

Several days later, Kate and Bella are working in the living room of the house. Kate is pushing Bella to stretch her shield more. Bella is beginning to understand how it feels. She finds that the hardest part is getting it to 'release' from her body initially. Once that happens, it is easier expanding it from there. She and Kate decide to test it.

"Hey, Emmett!" Bella calls. "Can you come here for a minute?"

"Sure, little sis," he says, jogging into the room. "What's up?"

"Are you up for a bit of a dare?" Kate asks.

He narrows his eyes at her. "Always."

"Great!" Bella says, moving to his side. "Hold your hand out flat. Okay, I'm going to hold my hand below yours and try to expand my shield to cover your hand. When Kate shocks you, you shouldn't feel anything."

He looks at her. "Try? You're going to try?" Then he continues in a perfect imitation of Yoda's voice. "No! Try not. Do . . . or do not. There is no try."

"And you damn-well better do," Rosalie comments as she enters the room to watch. "You break him, you buy him!"

"Ha ha – everyone's a comedian," Bella replies.

"Are you ready?" Kate asks.

"Give me a moment." Bella concentrates on her hand until she senses her shield releasing from her skin. Then she pushes it out, stretching it over Emmett's hand.

"Okay," she says, gritting her teeth with the effort.

Kate grins at Emmett, reaching out her fingers.

"Don't worry, it's just a low setting," she teases, lightly touching her fingers to Emmett's palm.

After a beat, he laughs. "Ha! Nothing. I feel nothing. You sure those digits are working, Katie? Maybe you've got a short some—"

"Aargh!" Bella groans and steps back. Her shield snaps back to her skin while Kate's fingers are still touching Emmett's hand.

"Mother Effer!" he yells, jumping back and grabbing his hand.

"Yeah, pretty sure I don't have a short," Kate muses, wriggling her fingers at him.

Rosalie rushes to Bella's side. "Bella, what happened? Are you okay?"

"Bella?" Emmett says, incredulously. "What about me? I'm the one that just got zapped!"

"Don't be a baby," Rosalie replies. "It will take more than that to fry you, you big ox. Bella?"

Bella shakes her head. "I'm okay. It just took a lot more effort than I was expecting."

"But you did it!" Rosalie says excitedly. "You shielded Emmett's hand!"

"Next time, a little warning before you stop would be appreciated," Emmett says, shaking his hand.

"Emmett, I'm so sorry," Bella says. "Are you sure you're okay? We shouldn't have asked you to do that!" she says with remorse.

"Nonsense, Emmett takes worse than that we wrestle out back," Edward says from the doorway. They turn to see that everyone has joined them to observe their little test.

"He's right, Bella. I'm perfectly fine," Emmett says, reassuring her.

"That was the greatest thing I've seen in a while," Jasper says with a laugh.

"This is wonderful progress, Bella," Carlisle remarks.

"Yes," Eleazar observes, "It shows that you have control over your shield, and can manipulate it. It will only get better with practice."

"Okay, then, everyone out!" Kate commands. "My little padawan has work to do!"

Edward goes outside with Carlisle and Eleazar while the others go about their activities.

"Edward, I must say that Bella is doing remarkably well," Carlisle says.

"I agree," Eleazar says.

"Yes, she's amazing," Edward replies. "But are we any closer to discovering why she's lost all her memories so completely?"

"The only other vampire I've ever met that has no recollection of their human life is Alice," Eleazar says.

"Yes, but we've learned why that's likely," Carlisle remarks.

"Is that so?" Eleazar asks.

"Yes. She's been successfully researching her human life. It appears that she was institutionalized because of her precognition. They thought she was mad and subjected her to rather crude electric shock treatments. It's likely she lost her memories while she was still human, so there was nothing for her to remember as a vampire." Carlisle explains.

"It's fascinating how cruel humans can be to one another, isn't it?" Eleazar comments.

"Yes, although humans don't have exclusive rights to that trait. Our kind engages in their fair share of it, too."

"Bella? Any thoughts?" Edward asks impatiently, bringing them back to the subject at hand.

"Nothing yet," Carlisle replies. "Has she mentioned any changes to you?"

"No. None."

"Well, we'll just have to keep looking. And you'll have to keep letting her get to know you, Edward," Carlisle encourages him. "You're her mate. Just because she doesn't remember it, doesn't change that fact."

"Doesn't it?" Edward snaps.

"Son," he says, placing a comforting hand on Edward's shoulder, "I know this must be incredibly difficult for you. But, you must stay strong. She's safe. She's here with us, where she belongs. I'm confident things will turn out as they should."

"But how is it that she feels virtually nothing for me?" Edward asks, exasperated. "It hurts me to have her out of my sight, yet she feels nothing!"

"We'll figure it out, Edward. Take comfort in the fact that she's here with you. Make the most of this time. Everything you do adds to the relationship you two have, whether or not she remembers her past."

Edward nods. "I guess I'll go back to our cottage and work on a few of the unfinished projects."

"Okay, son. We'll see you later," Carlisle says before Edward runs off toward the cottage.

"You know, we have no basis on which to propose that Bella will regain her memory," Eleazar cautions in a whisper.

"Perhaps none based on established vampire knowledge, but I think we have solid reason to believe it will happen," Carlisle responds, also in a barely audible murmur.

"How can you give him that type of false hope?" Eleazar argues.

"It's not false hope. It's Bella. She's defied our expectations at every turn. I have confidence that she'll do it in this instance as well."

Eleazar shakes his head but Carlisle merely smiles.

* * *

**Have I mentioned that the incomparable MarieCarro Vanadesse made the stunning banner for this story? She makes all things beautiful!**


	11. Chapter 11

Bella's diligence begins to have dramatic results. Within days of the experiment with Emmett, she is able to release her shield and push it away from herself with ease. By the following week she can expand it to entirely cover Alice; something that has her friend bouncing with excitement.

Her biggest challenge is maintaining her expanded shield for any amount of time. She experiments with expanding it and trying to hold it for longer and longer amounts of time. However, she never succeeds for more than a few moments.

Finally, after countless failed attempts, Edward offers some input.

"You know, Bella, when I read someone's thoughts, it's not something that I struggle to do –"

"Well, goody for you!" Bella blurts harshly, releasing her pent-up frustration from all her failures.

Edward recognizes her outburst for what it is and pushes forward. "No, I don't mean to boast that it's easy for me. When I was first changed, I thought I was going mad with all the voices I heard all the time. With Carlisle's help, I learned how to filter them, how to listen to only the ones I wanted to hear and block out the rest. Much like you're learning how your shield works. What I meant was, the mind-reading itself was easy. I could do that without any thought. Perhaps you're working too hard at maintaining your expanded shield."

"What do you mean?" she asks, intrigued.

"Once you've expanded your shield, remember it's still a part of you. It's not something other than yourself that you must work to control. It just is. Like the human body: the heart beats without conscious thought; lungs bring in and expel air without conscious effort. They are just there, as part of the body, doing what they are meant to do."

"Huh," is Bella's skeptic reply.

"Well," he smiles, "for whatever it's worth."

"Yeah, thanks."

"I guess I'll leave you two to your work, then."

"Thanks, Edward," Kate says as he leaves.

"Do you think there's anything to what he said?" Bella asks.

"Well, I never thought about it that way before, but yes, I do. Once I learned my gift, it really is that easy. I just think that I want to use it and how strong I want the charge to be, then it's just there."

"Okay, well, let's see how it goes."

Bella and Kate work for a few more hours without any real success before Kate declares that it's time for a break. Alice comes into the room as if on cue.

"Hey, would you both like to hunt?" she asks.

"Thanks Alice, but Rosalie and I are going to Port Angeles for a little shopping," Kate replies. "Bella, you should go though. It's important that you keep your thirst under control so we can focus on working with your shield."

"Okay," Bella says, "I'll hunt with you."

"Have fun in PA," Alice says with a wave to Kate as she and Bella leave the house.

After a successful hunt, Bella sits on a fallen log and Alice joins her.

"Alice, can I tell you something?"

"Of course. Anything, Bella."

"Edward can't know about our conversation, okay?"

"Okay. I can block it from him. What's on your mind?"

"Well, you all have been wonderful to me," Bella begins. "I feel like I've been building real friendships with each of you. I know they're not the same as they were before, but they're authentic."

"Of course they are, Bella. We all love you!"

Bella gives her a small smile. "I know that. It's just, with Edward . . . it's not the same. I _know_ how he feels about me and . . . well, I just don't feel the same way. I feel like it's not fair to him for me to be here, living with you all, but not living as his wife."

"Oh, Bella. You have to understand, Edward is tied to you forever. He'll wait as long as it takes."

Bella stands, frustrated. "But I don't want him to be 'tied to me'! I don't want him lurking around the fringes of my life waiting for me to love him! It's too much! Too much pressure. Too much expectation. Just too much."

"Bella, it will –"

"No! No, Alice, it won't be all right. I feel like I'm breaking his heart more every day when I don't remember who we were. When I don't love him. So, after the Volturi visit, I've decided I'm going to leave."

"What! No, Bella! You can't. That would just break Edward. And it's not what you want either. Not really."

"Stop! Alice, just stop. I love you, but you don't know everything. I'm not who I was. I hate that being who I am now means other people are going to be hurt, but I can't change it. I can't force myself to love him. Besides, I need some time to figure out who I am. Who I want to be in this new life."

"I see. I didn't mean to push, Bella. Of course, you need to do what's best for you. Where will you go?"

"I've talked with Carmen. She and Eleazar said I'm welcome to stay with them in Alaska. That's really my only choice since I don't exactly know other vampires."

"Well, that's not bad. They're not so very far away. We can still visit!" Alice says, perking up.

"Yes, you could, but I'd prefer if it you didn't. At least for a while until I get my footing."

"I understand."

"You're sure you can keep this conversation from Edward? I'll talk to him after the Volturi visit. I don't want to distract him before then."

"Yes, I can keep this from him. Oh, Bella!" Alice hugs her. "I'm so sorry this is how things are. I still see you with us – with Edward – happy. I still believe that will be how things turn out in the end."

Bella gives her a small smile. "Maybe, Alice. But I have to deal with how things are now."

Alice nods and they slowly make their way back to the house.

* * *

**Just two more chapters. Let me know what you're thinking.**


	12. Chapter 12

**I can't hold off any longer. These last two chapters are going right up!**

* * *

It's been several weeks since Alice's original vision. Autumn is upon them and the leaves begin to change.

Bella works with her shield every day. She has grown to understand it better. She recognizes the feel of it on her skin and the feel of it when she expands it beyond herself. She sees its glimmer, though none of the others can. She's had success expanding it a bit more each day, but she still is unable to maintain it for more than a moment or two.

Eleazar, Carmen, and Kate say their farewells and take a circuitous route home to avoid the suspicion of leaving a direct trail from the Cullens.

Bella and the Cullens all hunt every other day to maintain their strength. A few fighting drills are practiced each day, though they quickly dissolve into good-natured wrestling matches.

Alice continues watching for anything that would reveal Aro's motivation for sending the twins. She also watches for decisions that would give them a better idea as to when the twins will arrive.

Edward knows something is up with Alice because she's singing ABBA songs on a continual loop in her head. When he corners her about it, she refuses to reveal anything. She simply assures him that she still sees he and Bella happy together.

A few days after the Denali's leave, Alice gets a vision of the twins leaving Italy. "Aro's directed the twins to take the Volturi's private jet to Seattle, then travel by foot the rest of the way. He wants to hear back from them by October 14."

"Today's the 6th. They'll arrive any day." Carlisle says.

"What do we do?" Bella asks, suddenly nervous.

"Just what we've been doing," Edward says, trying to reassure her.

"I'm sure Aro just wants them to meet you and see for themselves that you are now one of us," Esme says, giving Bella a fierce hug.

"And if that's not their intention, we're ready to fight!" Emmett says enthusiastically.

"We've planned for this, Bella," Jasper reassures her. "Alec's gift takes time to work, and Jane can only focus on one person at a time. If they want to try anything, we'll be able to overtake them before they can get to us."

"We really have looked at this from every angle," Edward says. "Either way they play it, we'll be okay."

Bella nods, absorbing their words.

And they continue to await the arrival of the Volturi.

They don't have to wait for long. Just two days later Alice sees them deciding where to direct a taxi to stop on their way to the outskirts of Seattle. Based on that, they estimate that the twins will arrive within the next several hours, so they prepare.

Mostly, they want to have control of the 'field of battle', as Jasper calls it, in case things go badly. They all have assigned locations in the Cullen's expansive backyard, each with a strategic advantage in a fight. Bella and Edward are to be in the middle of the yard with Carlisle nearby to greet the twins. They all go to their assigned spots and wait, still as statues.

Edward detects their thoughts first, then they hear the twins approaching in the woods, breaking through the tree line moments later.

The twins take several steps into the yard before stopping.

"I see you are expecting us," Jane says dryly.

Carlisle takes a few steps forward. "Jane, Alec, welcome to our home. You are correct that Alice saw you would be visiting."

"Hmm. I wonder, did she see all of us?" Jane muses. At that moment a third vampire enters the yard.

"Zafrina?" Carlisle asks. She is one of three vampires in an Amazon coven that has always existed as isolated as possible. His surprise at seeing her with the Volturi is evident. "It is a great pleasure to see you."

He continues to be courteous, hoping that this is merely a visit. "You are all welcome. I believe Aro wishes to confirm that Bella has, indeed, become one of us." He gestures to her. "You can clearly see that she has. Edward changed her himself."

Jane looks at Bella disdainfully, her eyes gliding from head to toe before turning back to Carlisle.

"Yes, so I see. Aro will be pleased to receive this report." She turns her head slightly toward Alec and he nods at her.

"Aro has asked that I extend an offer to you," she starts.

Edward snorts before speaking for the first time. "We're not interested in your offer, Jane. None of us wish to join the Volturi."

Bella notices that a fog seems to have moved in. It strikes her as odd considering the clear day. Something about it is wrong, and she tries to figure it out while the others are speaking.

"Are you certain?" Jane asks sweetly. "It's quite a nice arrangement -"

"Save your breath," Edward cuts her off. "Nobody's going with –" Edward stops speaking in mid-sentence. Bella turns to him and he is just standing there, absolutely still, much like they all had spent their night.

"Edward? What's wrong? What's going on?" She looks around frantically to see that all the Cullens are similarly immobile.

"Hmm, interesting," Jane muses. "Alec, I think our friend is immune to your gift."

"No!" Bella says. "The fog. It's you!" she accuses Alec. He shrugs his shoulders and smirks at her. "But why didn't the others notice it? They would have known right away what you were doing."

"You're a clever little newborn, aren't you?" Jane taunts her. "But you don't need to know all our secrets. We, however, want to know all of yours. It seems you're immune to several things. Let's see if you're still immune to my gift."

Jane focuses all her attention on making Bella writhe in pain. For her part, Bella braces for what Edward had described as unbearable pain. But it never comes.

Suddenly, Jane blinks and takes a breath. "Hmm." She looks at Alec, giving him a slight nod toward Esme. "Let's make sure everything's working properly for me, shall we?" She turns her gaze to Esme who falls to the ground, screaming in agony.

"No! Stop!" Bella pleads.

"Oh?" Jane stops torturing Esme and Alec quickly covers her in fog again, immobilizing her. "I really think we just need to make sure that wasn't a fluke. You pick this time, Alec."

The fog clears around Emmett and Jane brings him to his knees with her excruciating pain.

Bella is in shock to see the giant of a man so completely incapacitated by the pain. She doesn't even have a chance to plead for mercy before Jane stops and Alec again immerses Emmett in fog.

In the next moment, Alice falls to the ground, gripping her head and moaning.

"No! Alice! Stop! Please stop. Why are you doing this? What do you want?" Bella yells, kneeling at Alice's side. She tries to release her shield to cover Alice, but she's so frantic it's not working.

Alice stops screaming when Jane recalls her thoughts of pain, and Alex shrouds her in fog again.

"What do we want? What do we want?" Jane muses, tapping her lips. "I think I want to test this just one more time."

She sets her sights on Edward with an evil smile. Bella runs to stand in front of him even though she knows Jane can still torture him.

In the split second between the time Alex pulls back his mist, and the moment Jane inundates him with pain, Edward manages to say three words to Bella. "Like a heartbeat." Then he falls to the ground in agony.

Instead of yelling and pleading with Jane, Bella kneels next to Edward and focuses on releasing her shield. She feels it lift from her skin and she pushes it out, expanding it, stretching it to cover Edward. Once it covers him completely, he is free of pain and shoots Bella a small smile. "Now, just breathe. It simply _is._"

Bella tries not to focus on her shield, but rather, just maintain a slight awareness of the fact that it is there. She thinks about it wrapping around Edward and that's exactly what it does.

Slowly, Edward rises and faces Jane. Jane doesn't know what Bella can do, and she is dumbfounded as to why her gift has stopped working on Edward. She redoubles her efforts to cause him pain and, as she does so, Edward is able to read her thoughts.

Aro's orders to her and Alec were simply to confirm Bella's transformation. They were instructed to invite any and all members of the coven to join them in Italy, but it was just to be an invitation. No coercion, no strong-arm tactics. Jane's little show here today was simply a vindictive, sadistic vampire trying to get revenge on the once-human girl who was immune to her gift. She wanted to use her gift on Bella. Failing that, she wanted to hurt the ones Bella loved. And play it off as a sanctioned show of force. Such a petty plan.

"How are you not feeling my pain?" Jane screeches. "Brother, incapacitate him again!"

Alec's fog surrounds Edward, but the shield keeps it from reaching him and he remains unfazed. His pride in Bella's ability blooms even brighter in his chest, but he remains focused on Jane.

"The others are still useless to you. I can continue torturing them, one by one, indefinitely. I can make them beg for their own destruction!" she threatens.

Edward tries to make sense of Zafrina being there. He needs to know if she's a threat to them. Through her thoughts he realizes that she is an unwilling participant. Jane and Alec are holding her sister and threatened to harm her if Zafrina didn't help them. It was because of Zafrina's gift manipulating their vision that they didn't see Alec's mist until it was too late. She's not here to fight them.

"Can you?" Edward asks.

Before Jane can consider how to answer, Edward uses his immense speed to suddenly appear behind her, grabbing her in a hold that could separate her head from her body in one easy move. The twins' reliance on their gifts, and lack of real fighting experience, has worked to his immense advantage.

"Release the rest of our family, Alec," he demands. "Release them or I will destroy Jane and then you."

"You would never survive Aro's wrath if you did," Alec replies.

"We are innocent of any wrong doing, yet we suffered this unprovoked attack. Aro may regret losing you, but he cannot deny our right to defend ourselves."

"Don't release them, brother! He is bluffing. He wouldn't harm us!" Jane yells, nearly hysterical.

"Sister," Alec replies calmly, "We have no further duties here. The newborn still cannot suffer your pain; though I agreed to help you try. I will not lose you over a misplaced need for revenge."

The fog of his paralyzing gift slowly disintegrates and the Cullens regain their senses. Jasper runs to Alice who is still on the ground where she fell and learns that Jane tortured her. Esme hurries to Carlisle's side and tells him what happened to her while the others were without their senses. Emmett is the last to come back to himself and when he does, he lets out a mighty roar.

"Who do you think you are to treat us like that?" he yells. "I will destroy you myself you vindictive witch!" He starts running toward the twins.

Edward yells for Jasper's help in stopping him. Jasper sends a wave of exhaustion to Emmett that's so strong, he staggers before collapsing to the ground.

"I must say I agree with, Emmett, though," Jasper says. "We should eliminate the threat that these two pose while we have the chance."

"Alec was just saying how much he and Jane want to get back to Italy. Isn't that right, Alec?" Edward says.

"Our work here is done," Alec agrees.

"I'll tell you what," Edward says, "we won't tell Aro what you did here today, as long as you do one thing."

"What is that?" Alec asks.

"We're not giving them anything but their lives!" Jane insists.

"Return Senna. Allow her and Zafrina to go home without further interference," Edward asserts.

"Very well," Alec says.

"Brother!" Jane stomps her foot in frustration.

"Sister, Aro isn't aware of their involvement. You were going to have to release them both, anyway."

"Alice?" Edward asks.

"Yes, this will work out," she replies through her thoughts.

"Release my sister," Alec says. "We will fetch Senna and then return home. This encounter has grown tedious."

Edward releases Jane, and she hurries to Alec's side. She looks at Bella and Edward with undisguised hatred.

Edward just laughs at her. "You still can't hurt me, Jane. Good luck figuring that one out!"

"Peace, sister," Alec says. "It is time to be done with this."

They turn and disappear into the woods. With a grateful glance toward Edward, Zafrina follows them.

"What'd you do, bro?" Emmett asks. "How come she can't hurt you?"

"Because Bella put her shield around me." He turns to face her. "And she's been holding it there for quite some time now."

Bella's eyes go wide as she realizes that she did it without any real conscious effort. The surprise of the realization, though, causes her shield to retract back to her skin. "Well, not any more though," she says quietly.

"Bella, that's extraordinary," Carlisle says. "And neither Jane nor Alec could get past it?"

"No," Edward answers, looking into Bella's eyes. "She was amazing."

Bella gives him a nervous smile and takes a step back from him.

"How long did Alec have us immobilized," Carlisle asks.

"Only a few minutes. Long enough for Jane to entertain her sadistic nature," Edward says.

"I had no idea the Volturi even knew about the Amazon coven," he says in surprise.

"What does she do?" Rosalie asks.

"Zafrina has a very powerful gift," Carlisle explains. "She makes anyone see and experience anything she wishes. She can trick any or all of their senses."

"That's why we didn't know Alec was using his gift until it was too late," Edward says. "Jane is holding Zafrina's sister and threatened to torture her relentlessly if she didn't help here today. Zafrina tricked our vision, so we didn't see the fog."

"We're fortunate they didn't bring other members of the guard with them," Jasper comments. "Even with you and Bella unaffected, if Felix or Demetri had been here, they could have easily overpowered you both, and then killed us all. Today could have turned out much differently," he says, giving Alice a tight hug.

"Wait," Bella says, alarmed, "you really thought they might destroy us all?"

"We had to consider all the possibilities," Carlisle says. "We don't have much to fear in this life, but it's important to recognize the Volturi as a potential danger."

"So, you . . . you were all willing to be destroyed because of me?"

"Bella, our lives were linked with yours the day you walked into Edward's biology class," Alice says. "That link became unbreakable the day he chose to return to you from Alaska."

The weight of this potential sacrifice nearly brings Bella to her knees.

"I know you don't remember when we first met," Edward begins.

"No – I. You," she looks at Edward, but he can't read her expression. She looks at the others in turn. "You all -. I can't believe you would be willing to do that. I need - I need to clear my head."

"That's understandable," Carlisle says.

"I think I'll go for a run."

"Can I join you?" Edward asks.

"I'm sorry, I'd really like to be alone."

"You probably shouldn't be alone while the Volturi are still in the area," Jasper advises.

"Ugh! Okay, I'll just run to the meadow. Is that all right?"

"Okay, that should be fine, love," Edward replies.

She glances at him one more time before taking off at a dead run.

Alice comes to stand next to Edward, taking his arm in a sisterly hug. "She just needs a little time, Edward."

"Have you seen anything new?"

Alice takes a moment, trying to look for Bella's future, when her gaze turns glassy. Edward enters her thoughts and watches as Alice's vision shows him and Bella entering their cottage together and exploring it excitedly.

A moment later Alice looks at him and smiles. "Yes, something new."

In that moment, when she's feeling such joy for Edward and Bella, her mind slips and suddenly he sees the conversation Alice had with Bella. The one where she told of her plans to leave the family. To leave him.

His face contorts in pain and Alice realizes what he's seen.

"Edward, you weren't supposed to see that—"

"Is that still her plan, Alice? Is she even coming back from this 'run'? I have to find her. I can't let her go." Without another word, he takes off like a shot after Bella.

The others look at Alice questioningly. "Bella told me that, after the Volturi left, she was going to leave. She felt it wasn't fair to stay here when she doesn't return Edward's feelings. He wasn't supposed to know, but I slipped."

Jasper puts his arms around her. "It's alright, darlin'."

Alice nods and they all turn to go into the house.

* * *

**That Jane, eh? But Bella left! Did she go for a run or did she *gasp* leave?**


	13. Chapter 13

Edward wills himself to run faster than he ever has before. He knows what it was like when he tried to live his life without her. He can't do that again. He can't lose her. Even if she never remembers their life before she was changed, even if she only ever wants to be his friend, he'll take it.

Within minutes he is skidding to a stop at the edge of meadow. The flowers are no longer in bloom and the grass is not as lush as in the summer time, but the surrounding trees are lovely in their autumnal colors. They fade, though, in comparison to the beautiful woman standing in the middle of the field.

Finding her truly there, and not already gone from his life, makes him sag against a tree in relief. Her back is to him, and he simply watches her for a moment.

"I know you're here, Edward," she says.

"May I join you?"

She nods her head, and he approaches her slowly, afraid she may still disappear from right in front of him. He comes to stand behind her.

"Are you alright, love?" he asks softly.

Her head is bowed. She's shaking it slowly from side to side as she turns around. She takes a tiny step closer to him, fitting her toes inside where he has planted his feet. It's an intimate stance, bringing her closer to him than she's been since before her change.

"I was going to leave," she says, staring at the middle of his chest. "Eleazar said I was welcome there."

"I know. Alice slipped just now, and I saw."

"I can't –" she starts, her voice full of pain.

"Shh. Shh, love," he says, tentatively placing his hands on her shoulders. "It's okay. You don't have to make any decisions right now."

Then, she lifts her gaze, and he's taken aback by the anguish he sees there.

"Bella?"

"I can't believe that you all were willing to sacrifice yourselves for me."

"Like Alice said, you've been a part of our family for a long time. We protect one another."

"It's not just that. I can't believe how wonderful you've all been to me ever since I woke from my transformation. Even though it wasn't what everyone expected."

"You're with us. That's what's most important."

"Mostly, though, I can't believe I didn't remember you, Edward. Us."

"_Didn't? _Past tense?" he probes, not daring to hope.

"I think it must have something to do with my shield. As I've gotten better at expanding it beyond myself, I've gotten some glimpses, feelings. I didn't know exactly what they were. But now I think they're memories. After I shielded Emmett's hand, I had a sense of being hugged by him. After I covered Alice, I experienced a sense of happiness and friendship that is beyond what I've felt since my change. And, Edward, now, after shielding you for so long –"

She'd be weeping now if that were possible. "Edward, I want to say that I love you. But what I'm feeling, it's so much more than that! I need you in order to breathe. Without you the sky is the wrong color." She looks down at her feet. "I'm so bad at this! I don't know how to describe it!"

"Bella," he says, placing a finger under her chin and coaxing her to look at him. The smile on his face is breathtaking, "Oh, Bella. That's the mate bond. You feel it? Truly?"

She nods frantically. "I can't be away from you. It hurt just running here without you."

He must be sure, though.

"You're not just saying that? It's not some ill-placed sense of obligation?"

"You know I was planning to leave. God, it hurts to even think about that now."

He pulls her into a crushing hug and swings her around, laughing.

When he sets her down, she can't get the words out fast enough. "I'm so sorry I pushed you away! I'm sorry I did things that hurt you. God, I'm so sorry I had Jasper take me on my first hunt!"

He laughs some more. "Stop, Bella. Just stop. None of that matters. You remember now, and I'm the happiest man in the world."

His hand glides along her jaw as he leans in slowly. His lips on hers are tender, reverent; fitting for a treasure once lost, now found.

* * *

**Cjesmom - I hope you enjoyed it! I sure had fun writing it.**

**Thanks again to my beta (and a fabulous cheerleader), EdwardsFirstKiss.**

**Thanks to the uber-talented MarieCarro Vanadesse who made the gorgeous story banner.**

**Thanks to OnlyInValhalla and mama4dukes for talking me off the ledge once - okay - twice.**

**Thanks to Deonne DEagan for her work in coordinating FAGE 11. Be sure to check out all the other stories, including the one written for me by TwiAddictAnne, Heartbreak Boy. It's fantastic!**

**Drop me a review and let me know what you thought of this little tale.**

**As ever, Twilight belongs to S. Meyer. No infringement intended.**


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